What Is Shaping The Person You're Becoming?

We've all heard the saying that you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with. I think there's some truth in that, but I also think it's incomplete.

Because influence doesn't just come from people anymore.

It comes from the books we read, the podcasts we listen to, the conversations we have over coffee, the people we follow online, the environments we spend time in and, increasingly, the technology we invite into our lives. Every one of those things quietly shapes the way we think. And the way we think eventually shapes the way we live.

When I look back over the last decade, I realise that some of my greatest influences have been people I've never actually met. Researchers. Authors. Psychologists. Writers. Some of them have been dead for decades, yet their work still influences how I see the world today. Others have simply been ordinary conversations with extraordinary people, or a journal entry I'd forgotten I'd written that somehow arrived at exactly the right moment.

What is influencing you already

That's one of the things I find so fascinating about Personal Intelligence. It reminds us that growth isn't about endlessly collecting more information. It's about becoming aware of what's already influencing us. Because whether we notice it or not, we're constantly being shaped by what we repeatedly consume.

The real question isn't whether you're being influenced. It's whether you're choosing those influences intentionally.

For me, that's become even more important as technology has become part of almost every aspect of our lives. Technology can constantly distract us, overwhelm us and pull our attention away from ourselves. Or, when it's designed ethically, it can do the exact opposite. It can help us notice patterns, create space for reflection and gently return our attention to the things that matter most.

That's one of the reasons I built Midlife Renaissance.

Not because I wanted technology to replace human wisdom. Quite the opposite. I wanted it to help people reconnect with their own. I wanted to create something that made it easier to recognise patterns, trust themselves a little more deeply and remember things they would otherwise forget.

Because that's what Personal Intelligence really is. It's your own intelligence becoming visible to you.